Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Open wide and say nothing

Is this the month that all dental hygienists get together and collaborate on what they'll say to their patients? Like Mongo and PC, I too had a strange encounter when I recently visited the dentist. I wasn't really ready for the inquisition and I didn't think she would be as hard on me. I have a love/hate relationship with dentists and hygienists and it usually takes years before I feel comfortable with them.

It started out when she asked, "When you sleep, are you a mouth breather?"
Well I don't know, do I? Talk about taking me off guard. That's the first time, and I hope, the last, someone asks that.

Next was "Do you eat toast?"
Well, yeah I do. I asked how she knew. Apparently when you eat toast the palate gets scratched from the toast rubbing against it. And it's only a problem if the scratches stay 'fresh' for two weeks or so. I'll try and remember that the next time I decide to binge on toast. I'll certainly have to file that tidbit away so I can amaze my friends at my next party.

"Do you floss every day?"
When I replied 'I try to' she responded with "At least that's better than the last two times I asked and you said, 'ahmm, ahmm' " Does she has an incredible memory or does she record everything I say?? I am really starting to wonder.

She would be the last person I would ever want to antagonize. There are too many sharp instruments at her disposal.